We're all in the same boat...so I'd may as well be happy!

So now that the impulsive anxiety and panic have been addressed and managed, I would like to take a new direction, because I now realize the following: I’m normal and I’m just like everyone else! Everything I feel, fear, worry about, think about, and obsess about are things that the entire world worries about.

·         We are all going to die one day and we are all afraid of it

·         We all fear becoming seriously or terminally ill

·         We all fear losing a loved one

·         We all fear the possibility of a family member or a loved one becoming ill or dying

·         We all fear losing our jobs

·         We all have some type of emotional or physical condition that we have to live with. For some it’s a bad back, a bad neck, a bad knee, a chronic condition, allergy, syndrome, IBS, Chrons, physical deformity, high blood pressure, diabetes, and the list goes on. And if it’s not a physical issue, it’s an emotional issue such as depression, anxiety, eating disorders, OCD, etc. And if it’s not that, it could be addiction or substance abuse. And if not that, it could be financial hardships. And for many it’s a combination of a few of those. And that’s not even counting the terminal illnesses; I am only referring to the illnesses that people have to live with for their entire lives. And no one is immune to it. as happy as anyone seems, if you dig deep enough you will discover the physical or emotional pain and/or fear that the person lives with.

So we all either have something that we live and deal with, and we all have fears. So what’s the difference between one person and the next? No one had a perfect upbringing; no one has no emotional or physical pain; no one is safe from ever becoming seriously ill; no one is safe from death; no one is safe from ever losing a loved one. We are all imperfect and we are all just as vulnerable. But somehow, some people look happier than others; some are positive about life and some are negative about life; some are depressed and others are not. If we’re all in the same boat, then what’s the difference between the different outlooks various people have about life? All things even, I’d rather join the group of happy people who enjoy life, who live in the present, who see the good, who minimize the bad, and who choose to live until they die, to be healthy until they get sick, rather than to waste their entire lives dying a thousand deaths or worrying about an illness that never comes, or trying to protect themselves from a certain death, only to die in a completely unexpected way. If I’m in the same boat as the rest of the world, I’d may as well enjoy the ride and be happy!

Before exploring this further, I must say that another reality check is that now that it is established that everyone is dealing with the same things and are in the same boat, not everyone who looks happy and well-adjusted really is. Many people deal with their fears and emotional pain, anxiety and worry by either drinking alcohol, taking excessive prescription medications, and abusing illegal drugs, and many people simply hide their feelings and put on a happy face while they deal with their fears and anxieties inside. So even among the “happy” people class there are many who are not as happy as it may appear. This further narrows down the pool of happy people who really enjoy life despite all of the realities mentioned above.

That said, before continuing to work toward joining the happy people, I must first list my advantages going in, all of which I am extremely thankful for:

·         I am not addicted to any substances which would only complicate the underlying issue, so whatever the issues are, they are what they are and nothing more

·         I am not on any mood-altering medication or substance, so I can always know what I am really feeling and address it accurately. This allows me to:

o   Be spared any withdrawal/rebound symptoms

o   Know if what I’m doing is actually effective

o   Be able to proceed once something is dealt with, without having the additional issue problem of weaning off of meds

·         Thankfully, I don’t have any debilitating, chronic pain

·         Thankfully, I don’t have any debilitating emotional issues that would affect my ability to get through the day, function, and enjoy my family and my life.

·         Thankfully, I don’t have any serious illnesses

So that said, going in:

·         I am me as I am, under no influences whatsoever.

·         I don’t have any serious issues that need to be addressed.

·         Anything I do have, I’ve had before and it’s gone away.

·         The pain I do have, as bad as it is, is not life-altering or really debilitating.

·         The pain I have is not constant and I know the cause and eventual solution and management.

·         I know that the pain is not indicative of, nor is it likely to result in, anything serious.

·         I have learned to not allow the pain to result in an anxiety attack or to be blown out of proportion to what it really is.

·         I know that there is no one to call and nowhere to go – which at one point made me feel helpless, but now makes me feel empowered to figure out what it is, what the best way to manage and eliminate it is, and the best way to prevent it in the future.